Parenting experts throughout the globe have consistently failed for many decades to help the world's parents totally eliminate their children's temper tantrums. One main reason for this is that parenting experts are mostly misguided and don't understand the real cause of temper tantrums. They think that the causes of tantrums are children's lack of problem solving skills, lack of alternate ways to express their emotion, lack of ability to verbally express themselves, low frustration tolerance, determination to have things their own way, and need for attention-all of which naturally leads to tantrum experimentation.
I have learned on my own that these are not the true causes of tantrums. They are, however, the causes of the initial anger that leads up to the tantrums. Over a twenty-three-year period, I have repeatedly demonstrated that if the initial anger of a child invokes the needed parental response, the anger quickly goes away and doesn't develop into a tantrum. One very real cause of tantrums is when parents don't meet the initial anger needs of their children.
If children consistently do not have their anger needs met, they then learn to trust in that likelihood, and they tend to become predisposed to escalating quickly into temper tantrums. Conversely, if children consistently do get their anger needs met, they then learn to trust in that likelihood, and so they become predisposed not to escalate into temper tantrums. This happens when the parents demonstrate to the children that they understand the anger and will consistently respond to it the proper way.
I gained this understanding of proper anger responses through personal experience. My first five kids all threw temper tantrums. My last eight didn't. When my fifth baby was fourteen months and I learned how to improve my responses to his anger, he stopped throwing temper tantrums within a week or so. I then used my improved anger responses with my last eight children, from the time they were born, and it prevented all tantrums with them, for the duration of their entire childhoods.
I named my techniques Infant Anger Management partly because they can be easily used to teach even newborn infants never to throw temper tantrums. When parents give up their faulty ideas they've been taught about the causes of temper tantrums and learn the functional techniques that eliminate and prevent them, there won't be any temper tantrums left.
I have learned on my own that these are not the true causes of tantrums. They are, however, the causes of the initial anger that leads up to the tantrums. Over a twenty-three-year period, I have repeatedly demonstrated that if the initial anger of a child invokes the needed parental response, the anger quickly goes away and doesn't develop into a tantrum. One very real cause of tantrums is when parents don't meet the initial anger needs of their children.
If children consistently do not have their anger needs met, they then learn to trust in that likelihood, and they tend to become predisposed to escalating quickly into temper tantrums. Conversely, if children consistently do get their anger needs met, they then learn to trust in that likelihood, and so they become predisposed not to escalate into temper tantrums. This happens when the parents demonstrate to the children that they understand the anger and will consistently respond to it the proper way.
I gained this understanding of proper anger responses through personal experience. My first five kids all threw temper tantrums. My last eight didn't. When my fifth baby was fourteen months and I learned how to improve my responses to his anger, he stopped throwing temper tantrums within a week or so. I then used my improved anger responses with my last eight children, from the time they were born, and it prevented all tantrums with them, for the duration of their entire childhoods.
I named my techniques Infant Anger Management partly because they can be easily used to teach even newborn infants never to throw temper tantrums. When parents give up their faulty ideas they've been taught about the causes of temper tantrums and learn the functional techniques that eliminate and prevent them, there won't be any temper tantrums left.
About the Author:
Learn more about the causes of temper tantrums.To eliminate tantrums . visit Leanna Rae Scott's site for help with temper tantrums.
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